"Self-love is the greatest middle finger of all time."
Time and time again on this blog, I talk about self-love. Whether you are depressed, suffering, or just trying to live your best life it's always important to have your own happiness above all else, and here's why.
Self-love can teach you to understand yourself better
It can lead to more confidence in all aspects of life, whether that be work, school, sports, etc.
You can take better control of your life
It can improve friendships and relationships.
It can lead to a happier lifestyle.
It can of course help with mental health issues.
As someone who struggles with self-love, this all sounds great. The fact of the matter is, it isn't so easy especially if you are starting from a disadvantage.
So we know what self-love can lead to. Why is it still so important?
To me, the idea of self-love can be seen as a root. It is where our tree will begin to grow. A starting-point. Only when we love ourselves can our tree begin to grow. It is creating a foundation for growing flowers or fruits. To be able to properly love and give love to others (in this case our fruits and flowers) we must be able to love ourselves. I'm sure at one point or another we've all heard. "We must be able to love ourselves to truly love others". Whilst it may sound cliche and not be the entire truth. There was definitely a point in my life where I loved others and certainly not myself. Problem is, that doesn't get you very far and you often find yourself hurting. When you give everything you have whilst not receiving it in return it hurts.
Loving ourselves doesn't mean we are perfect and we can do no wrong. It simply allows us a greater understanding of ourselves. How do certain variables impact me? What works and what doesn't. It isn't about turning into some narcissist. It's accepting that we aren't perfect and we will make mistakes. That it is okay. You care for yourself the same way you would others.
Where do I start?
"How you love yourself is how you teach others to love you" - Rupi Kaur
Forgive yourself when you mess up
Know your worth
Stand your ground and don't allow yourself to be used
Prioritize yourself sometimes
Validate your emotions
Accept your failures
There's no right or wrong place to start. It's all a journey of gaining a more positive view or yourself. It won't be 24/7 love. That's a fantasy. It a constant reminder that despite all the bumps you may encounter, you do not lose sight that you are worth. There will be ups and downs that will be inevitable. Accepting them and forgiving yourself will go a long way. Whether your sad, angry whatever it is you may be feeling. Remember to love yourself. You are the only person who will always be there for you.
I'd love to hear other ways that we can practice self-love feel free to email me or comment below. Let us learn together.
- Thinking Mans Thoughts
I've created a Patreon for anyone who wants to help and support this journey I'm on. This isn’t about money nor will it ever be. I plan to blog as long as I have thoughts running through my head and stories to tell, but I’d be lying if I said it doesn’t help me in my situation. All support is appreciated but not mandatory. It's very awkward 'asking' for money especially when I don’t want it to come across like that is my intention.
If you've read all of that and still choose to support me, I will forever appreciate it.